April 26, 2024

Are you a donkey or an elephant?

1.) In regards to abortion I am _____ a.) pro-life. b.) pro-choice.
2.) The war on terror is _____ a.) a noble and just cause b.) destined to failure
3.) My opinion on the war on drugs _____ a.) is the same as Nancy Reagan’s – Just say No! b.) is that if we legalize them the crime rate will drop across the board.
4.) The best policy towards Iraq is _____ a.) to not stop at killing Hussein. b.) to get out while the gettin’s good.
5.) How I feel about America: _____ a.) love it or leave it.
b.) America is great because here we have free speech laws and respect people’s opinions.

This archived article was written by: Erik Falor, Jeff Spears

1.) In regards to abortion I am _____ a.) pro-life. b.) pro-choice.
2.) The war on terror is _____ a.) a noble and just cause b.) destined to failure
3.) My opinion on the war on drugs _____ a.) is the same as Nancy Reagan’s – Just say No! b.) is that if we legalize them the crime rate will drop across the board.
4.) The best policy towards Iraq is _____ a.) to not stop at killing Hussein. b.) to get out while the gettin’s good.
5.) How I feel about America: _____ a.) love it or leave it.
b.) America is great because here we have free speech laws and respect people’s opinions.
6.) Mike Leavitt is _____ a.) the best govenor since Heber M. Wells. b.) the worst govenor since … ever.
7.) The ACLU is _____ a.) off their rocker. b.) seated firmly upon their rocker.
8.) France is _____ a.) asking for it. b.) the voice of reason.
9.) The right to bear arms is _____ a.) an important right that we must protect. b.) not neccesary in this day and age.
10.) Rush Limbaugh is _____ a.) so good! b.) no good!
11.) Affirmative action _____ a.) does more harm than good. b.) helps to engender equality and has its place.
12.) Bill Clinton _____ a.) is a horrible and dishonest man.
b.) was the best president we’ve had in 20 years.
13.) The Grand Staircase Escalante National Monument was _____ a.) unfair to ranchers and miners. b.) the only way to protect the pristine beauty of Sothern Utah.
14.) The United Nations should _____ a.) stop telling us what to do. b.) be the only international body allowed to make decisions about going to war.
15.) Capital Punishment is _____ a.) a legitamate means to deter violent crime. b.) a crime in and of itself.
16.) Corporations should be _____ a.) left to run themselves as they please. b.) be regulated by the government.
17.) The military needs to be big enough to _____ a.) take on anybody who wants some. b.) adequately defend ourselves from REAL threats.
18.)Welfare is a government program that _____
a.) encourages people to be lazy and mooch off of folks with jobs. b.) helps people make it through tough times.
19.)The best way to meet the medical needs of everybody is to ____ a.) privatize healthcare so that the government mostly stays out of it. b.) socialize it so that everybody has equal access to quality health care.
20.)PC means _____ a.) Personal Computer. b.) Politically Correct.

How to score: for each question that you answered ‘a,’ tally one point. For each that you answered ‘b,’ give yourself two points. The score breakdown is as follows:
20-26 points: You would likely sell your own mother if there were a tax write-off for it.
27-33 points: Sitting on the fence. You should try forming an opinion someday.
34-40 points: You are probably a tie-dye wearing hippie. Go get a job.