July 22, 2024

Erik’s last will & testament

This archived article was written by: Erik Falor

What a great feeling it is to look back at my time at the College of Eastern Utah and say that it has been the best three years of my life. It hasn’t always been easy, but considering what I’ve been through, it has been worth it. Things are certainly looking up for the future. I’ll be walking out of here with a degree, I have found an adoring sweetheart, and have the makings of a real social life. It seems to be quite a shame to have to throw that away after the end of next week, but as my French speaking friends would say, such is life.
These have been some good times. I am going to miss the all-night programming parties, eating the occasional burger at the cafeteria, losing sleep over Larry Severeid’s term papers and kicking it with my CEU debate brother Jeff Spears. I’ll miss throwing things off the train bridge in Consumers Canyon, searching for ghost towns over spring break, and barbecuing at baseball games.
So, where to from here? After commencement, I will move back into my parents’ basement and work on completing my Yu-Gi-Oh! card collection. I will look forward to matriculating to Utah State University where I will continue in my studies of computer science, and find a nice job somewhere where I can insult people as they call in on the phone.
Now it is time to wrap up some loose ends. You might remember that I had reported on the public access computer kiosks set up in the CBB and McDonald Career Center. Last week I thought that I saw someone using one of those infernally inconvenient wireless computer kiosks to check their e-mail. That’s gotta be the most well spent $14,000 ever.
This spring has found the sod around Gibby looking more vibrant than ever. A whole school year of not being driven on by golf carts really works wonders. Now if we could just cut down on the foot traffic
I hope to someday come back to CEU’s Price campus and see lush green spaces where dirt lots now stand, or else at least see that we have developed an off-road vehicle program. Every time that I have run into a high schooler who was touring campus, I have told them that’s why our campus is home to three vacant lots. I figure that in order to increase enrollment, we all have to pull our weight.
I also hope that someday wireless internet technology will have advanced to the point where students living in the dankest, darkest recesses of Sessions Hall can have access to the Internet. Or maybe give them back their more reliable hard-wired internet connections and their money.
Someday I should like to see a tall lead barrier built between the Aaron Jones Hall and that infernal electrical substation, in order to protect the residents from the harmful electromagnetic fields and thought-capturing rays.
Oh, and while I’m at it, it would be nice if someday we got some new buses around here. Seriously, those things have been towed as many miles as they have driven under their own power.
My best memories of CEU revolve around those people who have gone the extra mile to further my education. If it were still hip to give props, I’d surely give them to Dr. George Uhlig, Henry Zwick, Jan Curtis, Melanie Henseler, Greg Borman, Dr. Susan Polster, and my brothers Les Bowen and BJ Harmon.
It’s been real, it’s been fun, and for Pete’s sake, keep it real.