Married in college: making time
I am taking nine-college credits and work full time. I do both of these things to help better my marriage so it’s a bit ironic that because of these things, I hardly ever see my husband. Since Henry is a full-time student, the only really solid time we have together is when we’re sleeping and I hardly think that counts. Henry and I kinda suck at the whole “planning ahead” thing too, which doesn’t help. Since I obviously don’t have much insight into how to make time with my husband, I asked other married women on campus how they make time for their sweeties.
This archived article was written by: Jenna Rae Rudolph
I am taking nine-college credits and work full time. I do both of these things to help better my marriage so it’s a bit ironic that because of these things, I hardly ever see my husband. Since Henry is a full-time student, the only really solid time we have together is when we’re sleeping and I hardly think that counts. Henry and I kinda suck at the whole “planning ahead” thing too, which doesn’t help. Since I obviously don’t have much insight into how to make time with my husband, I asked other married women on campus how they make time for their sweeties.
Bethany has been married to Wilford Woodruff since December. Their school schedules make it hard to see each other during the days. Bethany is involved with the theatre department and Willy is involved with student government which bites into their evenings. But they don’t let that keep them from seeing each other. Bethany says, “We tend to see each other during certain intervals of the day, whether it be in the morning or at lunch or just before I have rehearsals at night. During those intervals, we spend time cooking and eating together, watching television or just chatting.” Those small intervals really add up, according to Mrs. Woodruff. “We see a lot of each other during the week even though we have separate classes and such.”
That’s a great idea for me! I work on campus so it wouldn’t be such a stretch to adjust my lunch to Henry’s class schedule. That way we can eat together in my office or in the student center. Bonus: we don’t have the money to buy food at the cafeteria every day so we’ll spend time making lunches together in the mornings or evenings before bed.
I also talked to a woman who has an even harder time than Bethany and Willy or Henry and me; her name is Corrine Martinez and she has three children on top of school and work. She and her husband basically just take advantage of opportunities to spend time together whenever they arise. Corrine says that whenever they both happen to have an evening off on the same day, they always put the kids to bed early so they have some alone time. When only one of them has the day off, they help make time by eliminating the responsibilities of the other person. “My husband just called and asked which of our kids’ clothes couldn’t be dried,” says Corrine. When she gets home, laundry is one less thing she has to do and a bit more time she has with her husband. She also says that they set aside at least two nights a month as date nights. “We will go see a movie or go out to dinner, just the two of us.”
Also great ideas! I pretty much love how they take care of each other’s chores. Henry and I don’t really have chores split up, but that’s a good idea. If we each knew what our responsibilities were it would make it easier to plan our days and, as a result, plan more time together. Bonus: our house might be clean more often.
Women like Corrine make me feel pretty lame for complaining about my puppy. But she also makes me motivated to get my crap together now while making time can be easy, so that when Henry and I are knee-deep in the small people we make, we’ll already have the skills necessary to make time for each other.
