Top five quotes from family-friendly comedies
5. DUMB AND DUMBER
Part a:
Harry: I expected the Rocky Mountains to be a little rockier than this.
Lloyd: I was thinking the same thing. That John Denver’s full of $#!T.
Part b:
Harry: [shivering] Lloyd, I can’t feel my fingers, they’re numb!
Lloyd: Oh well here, take this extra pair of gloves, my hands are starting to get a little sweaty.
Harry: Extra gloves? You’ve had extra gloves this whole time?
Lloyd: Uh yea, we are in the Rockies
5. (Tie) TOMMY BOY
Tommy: Richard? Is this your coat?
Richard: Don’t do it.
This archived article was written by: Nathan Manley and Hayden Peterson
5. DUMB AND DUMBER
Part a:
Harry: I expected the Rocky Mountains to be a little rockier than this.
Lloyd: I was thinking the same thing. That John Denver’s full of $#!T.
Part b:
Harry: [shivering] Lloyd, I can’t feel my fingers, they’re numb!
Lloyd: Oh well here, take this extra pair of gloves, my hands are starting to get a little sweaty.
Harry: Extra gloves? You’ve had extra gloves this whole time?
Lloyd: Uh yea, we are in the Rockies
5. (Tie) TOMMY BOY
Tommy: Richard? Is this your coat?
Richard: Don’t do it.
Tommy: Fat guy in a little coat. Fat guy in a little coat.
Richard: Don’t
Tommy: [singing] Fat guy in a little coat. / Fat guy in a little coat.
Richard: Take it off, Dickhead, I’m serious!
Tommy: Richard! What’s happening?
[coat rips]
Tommy: Uh oh!
4. BILLY MADISON
Principal: Mr. Madison, what you’ve just said is one of the most insanely idiotic things I have ever heard. At no point in your rambling, incoherent response were you even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought. Everyone in this room is now dumber for having listened to it. I award you no points, and may God have mercy on your soul.
3. A KNIGHTS TAIL
Roland, Chaucer, Kate, Wat: [singing] He’s blond, he’s pissed, he’ll see you in the lists, Lichtenstein! Lichtenstein! He’s blond, he’s tanned, he comes from Gelderland, he comes from Gelderland! Gelderland, Gelderland, Gelderland… Gelderland, Gelderland, Gelderland…
Chaucer: [singing] He’s quick, he’s funny, he makes me lots of money, Lichtenstein! Lichtenstein!
2. WITHOUT A PADDLE
Jerry Conlaine: So this is Spirit River, we take that to Widowmaker Bend and then we hike to Devil’s Staircase and that should lead us right to the top of Hellfire…
Dan Mott: What’s with all these satanic names? Isn’t there, like, a Fluffy Bunny Way?
Tom Marshall: No… but there’s a Shut-Up-You-Big-Baby Ridge.
1. HAPPY GILMORE
Nursing Home Orderly: Good news, everybody, we’re extending arts and crafts time by four hours today.
Elderly Woman: My fingers hurt.
Nursing Home Orderly: What’s that?
Elderly Woman: My fingers hurt.
Nursing Home Orderly: Oh, well, now your back’s gonna hurt, ‘cause you just pulled landscaping duty. Anybody else’s fingers hurt?… I didn’t think so.
Grandma: Sir, can I trouble you for a glass of warm milk? It helps me go to sleep.
Nursing Home Orderly: You can trouble me for a warm glass of shut-the-hell-up! Now, you will go to sleep! Or I will PUT you to sleep. Check out the nametag. You’re in MY world now, grandma!
