This archived article was written by: Benoni Sowah
A man is by simple definition an adult male. He is expected to have some physical qualities of a male like bravery, strength and courage. He is a man by virtue of his sex. Some men claim gay, bisexual, heterosexual and metrosexual – a straight guy who’s so cool, smart, attractive, stylish and cultured, that everyone thinks he is gay. But he is so secure in his masculinity that he does not care.
My focus is on how some men who claim heterosexuality have limited themselves to what they can and cannot do. It has become hard to define what makes a man. Doing certain things makes one a man and not doing it makes him a sissy. A man by American society is expected to like football, be tough or play some kind of sport in school. And recently, a man should own a truck.
None of these qualities make a man. Real men do what is best for society; they truly love their wives and children and protect and provide for their home. A man should not avoid certain things just to prove that he is a man.
Men, please loose these stereotypical chains that bind you to act in a certain way to prove you are a man. Unless you have defined your sexuality then that is different. I encourage you to do the things you really want to do.
Watch chick flicks if you want to know women very well. You may not have been successful with your past relationships because probably you may have been trying to be a man by watching only action movies.
If you have not learned to cook because it is a sign that you are a man, then I am sorry, you would continue to eat from McDonalds and from that Mexican food vendor all the time. Some of the world’s top chefs are men. Quit eating Ramen noodles and learn to make some good food for yourself.
My mum always said, “ You are what you wear. No one would know what you have in your belly, they will see what is on your body.” Dress well; watch out for what is trendy, new and cheap. Always dress so your girlfriend or wife would feel confident showing you off. In Europe men know about fixing cars as much as they do fashion. Don’t be a brute just to prove you are a man
Who said pink and purple is for women only? Dudes, go to Abercrombie or Express and purchase some pink and purple shirts or ties to enhance your wardrobe. Women like men in pink and purple. It shows your confidence and how connected you are with your feminine side. Never forget the saying, “real men wear pink.”
Some people think that to look good they need to buy designer brands. It is not always true. At least you need to own some designer products. Some of the best places to buy good products are Wal-Mart and DI. Most people look down on products from these stores, they do not even take a look at what is on the racks. Even if you buy cheap products no one would know where you got them. Just take off the brand tags and say you bought them from Nameless Clothing.
Please go to the salon and have your feet and nails cleaned. Climax it with a massage. Stop hiding those wild grown nails in socks all the time. Ask other men who go to the salon; there is nothing as fun as having manicure or pedicure. If you always paid for your wife or girlfriend to go, next time go with her. Wax unibrows, they do not look good. If you can cut your hair, you can trim or wax your brow as well.
This is personal grooming; it does not take way from your masculinity. Enhance your looks. Even animals have some sort of grooming. Why can’t men?
If you think you are a real man, go the jungles of Africa and bring home the head of a lion and that will prove to me you are a man. David Beckham, a renowned soccer player, paints his nails pink to relieve boredom. He is married to one of the Spice Girls and has children.
Men are human beings with feelings. We have fears and insecurities. So when appropriate express those emotions. It melts the hearts of women when men cry about emotional issues. But please do not go about crying over small issues, she will leave you.
Do those simple acts that women love. That is what makes you a man. Buy her flowers, remember her birthday and cuddle with her while you watch her favorite movie. Go with her if invited, to her “all girls night”. You have no idea how proud that would make her.
Lucy wanted Joe to stay home and watch “ Mean Girls” with her so they could be all by themselves. He had a golf game with his friends so he refused and went his friends just so they will not say he is a sissy. Lucy watched the movie all by her self. She was hurt. Joe came back having fulfilled his desire to prove he is a man but met Lucy all sad. Lucy gave him the cold shoulder as usual. He could not understand where he went wrong.
Yes, there are times when men have to do their own thing. And I expect women to understand that. To me that is totally fine. But when the motive behind what we do is to prove we are men, then please stop. Be yourself and let people think what ever they want. People will talk about you anyway.
Life is too short to limit yourself to what you can and cannot do. If you are not old, very soon you will be and will not be able to do certain things. Please do look back and wish you had lived your youth differently.