November 27, 2022

Celebrating Christmas before Thanksgiving: Against

The Holidays. “Christmas season.” Corporate America’s excuse to get people to spend tons of money on loved ones to get into the “Christmas Spirit.” And nothing says “Christmas spirit” like Christmas decorations on the first day of November.

Except you forgot about something.

Thanksgiving.

That awkward middle child in the holiday family between Halloween and Christmas. Yeah, it still exists. The fact that it’s 2022 hasn’t changed a thing. November is too early for Christmas decorations. Anything other than a week before Christmas is too early for decorations. 

Christmas decorations in November breed hateful and spite filled people. No one wants to sit there for four months straight and celebrate a single day that half the world doesn’t even celebrate. Well, masochists do. Not the rest of us. If you’re the kind of person who’s spreading out lights and blowing up foam snowglobes in November, just know that you’re putting a target on your back from the HOA. 

Additionally, people aren’t enjoying your “Christmas spirit” as much as you are. You should be a kind person all year long, not just when Christmas rolls around and you want to be invited to parties. The “Christmas spirit” is a stupid concept in and of itself. It’s a kind of feeling that can only come around the holidays? What happens when you do something nice for someone on January first? Do you feel the “Christmas Spirit” still, even though Christmas time is over? Why is it even called the Christmas spirit then? Maybe we should stop glorifying Christmas and glorify being nice to each other.

And you know when the perfect time to be nice to each other is?

Thanksgiving.

Yeah, it still exists. Thanksgiving is an essential holiday that deserves its own time away from Christmas because it’s still a time of rest and relaxation. While Christmas has become a month-long competition of who has the coolest lights and most expensive presents, Thanksgiving deserves to be something separate in people’s minds. Even if you really hate your in-laws–or your extremely political uncle–you still swallow your ego and spend time with them. 

Christmas, however, has become a selfish holiday full of indulgence and selfish altruism.

Take the time after Thanksgiving to start pigging out and being obsessed with the Christmas spirit. Listen to Mariah Carrey till your ears burst, or whatever it is that Christmas loving people do. Just don’t forget to keep it in December, and more importantly don’t shove it in other peoples’ faces.

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